Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Randomize
