Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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