I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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