Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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