Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize