Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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