So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize