oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
