when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
