She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
