Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
