You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
