ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
