Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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