So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I understand Curling. That high.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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