do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
