There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
