gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Are we still banned from the library?
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
