I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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