I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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