He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
