Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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