Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
You work out of a Hotel?
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
