His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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