another moral hangover. fuck.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Randomize
