and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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