i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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