Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
