let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize