What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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