i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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