I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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