Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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