Who wears a wallet chain?!
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
