we have officially lost it.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
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I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
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We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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