I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
That's intense
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
this will be a night to untag.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
