Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
