Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
