this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize