Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
