did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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