You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
