he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
