Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
