Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
