I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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