i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
