He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
