I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.