thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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