sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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